I've made it to Wednesday...or, at least, my blog did.
"We are all failures; at least, the best of us are." - J. M. Barrie
Hope you're having a good week!
"She has spent most of the day reading and is feeling rather out of touch with reality, as if her own life has become insubstantial in the face of the fiction she's been absorbed in."
After You'd Gone - Maggie O'Farrell
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Ellington Boulevard by Adam Langer
"Every person on the streets
of New York is a type. The city is
one big theater where everyone
is on display." - Jerry Rubin
In Ellington Boulevard Adam Langer captures the enormity of New York City while at the same time making it seem like a small town where each person is only a few people removed from knowing the others. The novel revolves around a flat and each of the characters that is inadvertantly connected to its sale during the New York City real estate boom. First, there is Ike Morphy, a jazz clarinetist who hears music in even the most mundane activities of the city, the original owner of the flat who returns from six months in Chicago nursing his sick mother to find his apartment being sold out from under him. The would-be buyers are Rebecca Sugarman, overachiever editor of the American Standard and her deadbeat English Lit graduate student husband Darrell who can't seem to muster the motivation to finish his dissertation and graduate. The seller is the son of Ike's former landlord, selfish and self-righteous Jew, Mark Masler. The broker is Josh Dybnick a failed would-be New York actor who has found that he his best and most successful acting gig has been simply being a real estate broker. These are just a taste of all the characters that inhabit this book.
Surprisingly, this overabundance of characters isn't overwhelming in the least.
This is because, despite the vast number of them, Langer fully inhabits each of his characters. In Langer's capable hand, each character evolves into a three dimensional person that readers can nearly imagine meeting on the streets of New York. They aren't all lovable or even likeable, but it's hard not to recognize their reality and their humanity. Ellington Boulevard is driven entirely by its characters and their foibles as they count down the days until closing on apartment 2B.
At its heart, Ellington Boulevard is a book about artists and dreamers and a New York City that at once attracts them with its promises of a rich environment for artists and for dreams coming true while squashing their dreams beneath the unfortunate daily realities that living there entails. Each of the characters seems to struggle with a constant push and pull between their art, their dreams, and the possibility that New York exudes and their labors under the heavy financial burden that the city exerts upon them. In Langer's New York, there is a constant question of whether people will follow their hearts or whether they will sell out to the highest bidder, and readers will wait with breath held to see which of Langer's characters will choose which path.
The only thing that took away from this book, in my opinion, was the lack of traditional dialogue. Paragraph breaks and quotations are at a minimum which makes the book a bit slow going to start because it seems very dense. Once the first few pages are past, however, any struggles stemming from Langer's non-traditional style disappear as the story takes you in. Langer's New York is beautifully rendered and filled with big characters that capture the imagination. His love for and understanding of the forces that drive New York City shine through and make Ellington Boulevard a captivating read.
He still loves the sense of possiblity that permeates every building and block. He loves the view of the Hudson from Riverside Park, loves watching the ducks paddle in the Central Park pond, loves the almost-too-pungent scent of gingkos on Manhattan Avenue in the summer. He loves watching his dog's tail wag when he pulls Ike toward Strangers' Gate. He loves the sounds of baseball games in Morningside, mah-jongg tiles on 107th Street, playing cards outside the Frederick Douglass Apartments, the subway underfoot, the flutter and clang of the flags atop the Blockhouse -- every bit of it is music.
of New York is a type. The city is
one big theater where everyone
is on display." - Jerry Rubin
In Ellington Boulevard Adam Langer captures the enormity of New York City while at the same time making it seem like a small town where each person is only a few people removed from knowing the others. The novel revolves around a flat and each of the characters that is inadvertantly connected to its sale during the New York City real estate boom. First, there is Ike Morphy, a jazz clarinetist who hears music in even the most mundane activities of the city, the original owner of the flat who returns from six months in Chicago nursing his sick mother to find his apartment being sold out from under him. The would-be buyers are Rebecca Sugarman, overachiever editor of the American Standard and her deadbeat English Lit graduate student husband Darrell who can't seem to muster the motivation to finish his dissertation and graduate. The seller is the son of Ike's former landlord, selfish and self-righteous Jew, Mark Masler. The broker is Josh Dybnick a failed would-be New York actor who has found that he his best and most successful acting gig has been simply being a real estate broker. These are just a taste of all the characters that inhabit this book.
Surprisingly, this overabundance of characters isn't overwhelming in the least.
This is because, despite the vast number of them, Langer fully inhabits each of his characters. In Langer's capable hand, each character evolves into a three dimensional person that readers can nearly imagine meeting on the streets of New York. They aren't all lovable or even likeable, but it's hard not to recognize their reality and their humanity. Ellington Boulevard is driven entirely by its characters and their foibles as they count down the days until closing on apartment 2B.
At its heart, Ellington Boulevard is a book about artists and dreamers and a New York City that at once attracts them with its promises of a rich environment for artists and for dreams coming true while squashing their dreams beneath the unfortunate daily realities that living there entails. Each of the characters seems to struggle with a constant push and pull between their art, their dreams, and the possibility that New York exudes and their labors under the heavy financial burden that the city exerts upon them. In Langer's New York, there is a constant question of whether people will follow their hearts or whether they will sell out to the highest bidder, and readers will wait with breath held to see which of Langer's characters will choose which path.
The only thing that took away from this book, in my opinion, was the lack of traditional dialogue. Paragraph breaks and quotations are at a minimum which makes the book a bit slow going to start because it seems very dense. Once the first few pages are past, however, any struggles stemming from Langer's non-traditional style disappear as the story takes you in. Langer's New York is beautifully rendered and filled with big characters that capture the imagination. His love for and understanding of the forces that drive New York City shine through and make Ellington Boulevard a captivating read.
He still loves the sense of possiblity that permeates every building and block. He loves the view of the Hudson from Riverside Park, loves watching the ducks paddle in the Central Park pond, loves the almost-too-pungent scent of gingkos on Manhattan Avenue in the summer. He loves watching his dog's tail wag when he pulls Ike toward Strangers' Gate. He loves the sounds of baseball games in Morningside, mah-jongg tiles on 107th Street, playing cards outside the Frederick Douglass Apartments, the subway underfoot, the flutter and clang of the flags atop the Blockhouse -- every bit of it is music.
Monday, September 15, 2008
I Don't Like Mondays
It's a dangerous business going out your front door.
--J. R. R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
Happy Monday!
--J. R. R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
Happy Monday!
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Book Blogger Appreciation Week
Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.
- Unknown
Say, if you've been living in a cave for the past few weeks, I suppose it's possible that you haven't heard about Book Blogger Appreciation week. Well, it starts Monday with all sorts of festivities including a mind numbing amount of giveaways of books and other good stuff on My Friend Amy and a plethora of other participating book blogs. Check out the following for details on giveaways that will soon ensue, and be sure to head over to My Friend Amy to keep up with all the cool stuff going on in the book blogosphere in connection with BBAW throughout the coming week.

If you follow along for the festivities of BBAW at My Friend Amy, you will find many chances to win LOTS of goodies! Like what? Well have a look below. All of these things will be given away between September 15-19. There will be a huge variety of ways to win them and giveaways will be announced constantly throughout the week. So be sure to check in often!
A HUGE thank you to Hachette Book Group, Penguin Group USA, Harlequin, The B&B Media Group, Shera of SNS Blog Design, WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group, Catherine Delors, Pamela Binnings Ewen, Andromeda Romano-Lax, Ceceilia Dowdy, Sormag, Book Club Girl, Savvy Verse and Wit, Cafe of Dreams, Fashionista Piranha, and Hey Lady! Whatcha Readin'?.
Daily Raffles:
Monday--Books and Chocolate sponsored by My Friend Amy and Hey Lady! Whatcha' Readin?
Tuesday--Books and Going Green sponsored by My Friend Amy
Wednesday--Books and Coffee sponsored by My Friend Amy
Thursday--Books and Charity sponsored by My Friend Amy and Fashionista Piranha
Friday--Books and Movies sponsored by My Friend Amy
Win a Book Club Girl Hostess Survival Kit!
Do you find it's your turn to host book club and not only do you not know what to serve but you don't know what books to offer up for the next month's selection?! Let Book Club Girl come to your rescue with the Book Club Girl Hostess Survival Kit.
One lucky winner of the kit will receive:
* A basket of cheese, crackers, cookies and wine for up to 12 people
* 5 great book group books to vote on for your group's next pick. And Book Club Girl will then donate 12 copies whichever book is chosen for your entire group to read.
* 12 Book Club Girl mousepads to give out as party favors that night
* 12 Book Club Girl bookmarks to mark everyone's favorite passages
* 12 Book Club Girl coasters to protect your coffee table from all those wine glasses!
TWO SORMAG Goody Bags containing books and more!
A Special Pamper Me Basket from Cafe of Dreams!
From Avon Foot Works
~ Inflatable watermelon shaped foot tub
~ 3.4 FL oz Watermelon Cooling Foot Lotion
~ 3.4 FL oz Watermelon Exfoliating Foot Scrub
~ 12 count Watermelon Effervescent Foot Tablets
~ An ARC of So Long At The Fair by Christina Schwarz
~ A variety of Hot Chocolate and Tea mixes
A pre-made blog template from SNSDesign!
A Subscription to Poetry Magazine from Savvy Verse and Wit!
BOOKS
Mistress of the Revolution by Catherine Delors
The Moon in the Mango Tree by Pamela Binnings Ewen
The Spanish Bow by Andromeda Romano-Lax
John's Quest by Cecelia Dowdy
Confessions of a Contractor by Richard Murphy
Acedia & Me by Kathleen Norris
The Wordy Shipmates by Sarah Vowell
The Lucky One by Nicholas Sparks
The Book of Lies by Brad Meltzer
Supreme Courtship by Christopher Buckley
A Tale Out of Luck by Willie Nelson with Mike Blakely
The Heretic's Daughter by Kathleen Kent
When Will There Be Good News by Kate Atkinson
An Exact Replica of a Figment of My Imagination by Elizabeth McCracken
Exit Music by Ian Rankin
The Smart One and the Pretty One by Claire LaZebnik
Gunmetal Black by Daniel Serrano
Isolation by Travis Thrasher
The Miracle Girls by Anne Dayton and May Vanderbilt
Every Freaking! Day With Rachell Ray by Elizabeth Hilts
Dewey by Vicki Myron
The Shiniest Jewel by Marian Henley
Keep the Faith by Faith Evans
The Book of Calamities by Peter Trachtenberg
A is for Atticus by Lorilee Craker
After the Fire by Robin Gaby Fisher
Mike's Election Guide by Michael Moore
War as They Knew It by Michael Rosenberg
Fixing Hell By Col. (ret.) Larry C. James
Wild Boy: My Life with Duran Duran by Andy Taylor
The Last Under-Cover: The True Story of an FBI Agent's Dangerous Dance with Evil By Bob Hamer
Border Lass by Amanda Scott
Insatiable Desire by Rita Heron
Hungry for More by Diana Holquist
Free Food for Millionaires by Min Jin Lee
Trespassers Will Be Baptized by Elizabeth Emerson Hancock
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not by Trish Ryan
Never Surrender by General Jerry Boykin
Dream in Color by Congresswoman Linda Sánchez, Congresswoman Loretta Sánchez
Beyond Belief by Josh Hamilton
Cobain Unseen by Charles R. Cross
Doing Business in 21st Century India by Gunjan Bagla
Branding Only Works on Cattle by Jonathan Salem Baskin
Launching a Leadership Revolution by Chris Brady, Orrin Woodward
How to Hear from God by Joyce Meyer
Knowing Right from Wrong by Thomas D. Williams
Pope John Paul II: An Intimate Life by Caroline Pigozzi
Pure by Rebecca St. James
He Loves Me! by Wayne Jacobson
So You Don't Want to Go to Church Anymore by Wayne Jacobson and Dave Coleman
Move On, Move Up by Paula White
The Rosary by Gary Jansen
Shoot the Moon by Billie Letts
The Choice by Nicholas Sparks
Right Livelihoods by Rick Moody
by George by Wesley Stace
The Almost Moon by Alice Sebold
Trunk Music by Michael Connelly
Hollywood Crows by Joseph Wambaugh
Dead Boys by Richard Lange
The Gifted Gabaldon Sisters by Lorraine Lopez
Sisterchicks Go Brit! by Robin Jones Gunn
Beyond the Night by Marlo Schalesky
With Endless Sight by Allison Pittman
Harlequin Titles: To Be Announced
Many other blogs are giving away books and prizes for BBAW as well! You can see the links to all of these giveaways here.
- Unknown
Say, if you've been living in a cave for the past few weeks, I suppose it's possible that you haven't heard about Book Blogger Appreciation week. Well, it starts Monday with all sorts of festivities including a mind numbing amount of giveaways of books and other good stuff on My Friend Amy and a plethora of other participating book blogs. Check out the following for details on giveaways that will soon ensue, and be sure to head over to My Friend Amy to keep up with all the cool stuff going on in the book blogosphere in connection with BBAW throughout the coming week.
If you follow along for the festivities of BBAW at My Friend Amy, you will find many chances to win LOTS of goodies! Like what? Well have a look below. All of these things will be given away between September 15-19. There will be a huge variety of ways to win them and giveaways will be announced constantly throughout the week. So be sure to check in often!
A HUGE thank you to Hachette Book Group, Penguin Group USA, Harlequin, The B&B Media Group, Shera of SNS Blog Design, WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group, Catherine Delors, Pamela Binnings Ewen, Andromeda Romano-Lax, Ceceilia Dowdy, Sormag, Book Club Girl, Savvy Verse and Wit, Cafe of Dreams, Fashionista Piranha, and Hey Lady! Whatcha Readin'?.
Daily Raffles:
Monday--Books and Chocolate sponsored by My Friend Amy and Hey Lady! Whatcha' Readin?
Tuesday--Books and Going Green sponsored by My Friend Amy
Wednesday--Books and Coffee sponsored by My Friend Amy
Thursday--Books and Charity sponsored by My Friend Amy and Fashionista Piranha
Friday--Books and Movies sponsored by My Friend Amy
Win a Book Club Girl Hostess Survival Kit!
Do you find it's your turn to host book club and not only do you not know what to serve but you don't know what books to offer up for the next month's selection?! Let Book Club Girl come to your rescue with the Book Club Girl Hostess Survival Kit.
One lucky winner of the kit will receive:
* A basket of cheese, crackers, cookies and wine for up to 12 people
* 5 great book group books to vote on for your group's next pick. And Book Club Girl will then donate 12 copies whichever book is chosen for your entire group to read.
* 12 Book Club Girl mousepads to give out as party favors that night
* 12 Book Club Girl bookmarks to mark everyone's favorite passages
* 12 Book Club Girl coasters to protect your coffee table from all those wine glasses!
TWO SORMAG Goody Bags containing books and more!
A Special Pamper Me Basket from Cafe of Dreams!
From Avon Foot Works
~ Inflatable watermelon shaped foot tub
~ 3.4 FL oz Watermelon Cooling Foot Lotion
~ 3.4 FL oz Watermelon Exfoliating Foot Scrub
~ 12 count Watermelon Effervescent Foot Tablets
~ An ARC of So Long At The Fair by Christina Schwarz
~ A variety of Hot Chocolate and Tea mixes
A pre-made blog template from SNSDesign!
A Subscription to Poetry Magazine from Savvy Verse and Wit!
BOOKS
Mistress of the Revolution by Catherine Delors
The Moon in the Mango Tree by Pamela Binnings Ewen
The Spanish Bow by Andromeda Romano-Lax
John's Quest by Cecelia Dowdy
Confessions of a Contractor by Richard Murphy
Acedia & Me by Kathleen Norris
The Wordy Shipmates by Sarah Vowell
The Lucky One by Nicholas Sparks
The Book of Lies by Brad Meltzer
Supreme Courtship by Christopher Buckley
A Tale Out of Luck by Willie Nelson with Mike Blakely
The Heretic's Daughter by Kathleen Kent
When Will There Be Good News by Kate Atkinson
An Exact Replica of a Figment of My Imagination by Elizabeth McCracken
Exit Music by Ian Rankin
The Smart One and the Pretty One by Claire LaZebnik
Gunmetal Black by Daniel Serrano
Isolation by Travis Thrasher
The Miracle Girls by Anne Dayton and May Vanderbilt
Every Freaking! Day With Rachell Ray by Elizabeth Hilts
Dewey by Vicki Myron
The Shiniest Jewel by Marian Henley
Keep the Faith by Faith Evans
The Book of Calamities by Peter Trachtenberg
A is for Atticus by Lorilee Craker
After the Fire by Robin Gaby Fisher
Mike's Election Guide by Michael Moore
War as They Knew It by Michael Rosenberg
Fixing Hell By Col. (ret.) Larry C. James
Wild Boy: My Life with Duran Duran by Andy Taylor
The Last Under-Cover: The True Story of an FBI Agent's Dangerous Dance with Evil By Bob Hamer
Border Lass by Amanda Scott
Insatiable Desire by Rita Heron
Hungry for More by Diana Holquist
Free Food for Millionaires by Min Jin Lee
Trespassers Will Be Baptized by Elizabeth Emerson Hancock
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not by Trish Ryan
Never Surrender by General Jerry Boykin
Dream in Color by Congresswoman Linda Sánchez, Congresswoman Loretta Sánchez
Beyond Belief by Josh Hamilton
Cobain Unseen by Charles R. Cross
Doing Business in 21st Century India by Gunjan Bagla
Branding Only Works on Cattle by Jonathan Salem Baskin
Launching a Leadership Revolution by Chris Brady, Orrin Woodward
How to Hear from God by Joyce Meyer
Knowing Right from Wrong by Thomas D. Williams
Pope John Paul II: An Intimate Life by Caroline Pigozzi
Pure by Rebecca St. James
He Loves Me! by Wayne Jacobson
So You Don't Want to Go to Church Anymore by Wayne Jacobson and Dave Coleman
Move On, Move Up by Paula White
The Rosary by Gary Jansen
Shoot the Moon by Billie Letts
The Choice by Nicholas Sparks
Right Livelihoods by Rick Moody
by George by Wesley Stace
The Almost Moon by Alice Sebold
Trunk Music by Michael Connelly
Hollywood Crows by Joseph Wambaugh
Dead Boys by Richard Lange
The Gifted Gabaldon Sisters by Lorraine Lopez
Sisterchicks Go Brit! by Robin Jones Gunn
Beyond the Night by Marlo Schalesky
With Endless Sight by Allison Pittman
Harlequin Titles: To Be Announced
Many other blogs are giving away books and prizes for BBAW as well! You can see the links to all of these giveaways here.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Blogging Without Remorse
If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read "President Can't Swim". – Lyndon B. Johnson
That's one day of this week's Weekly Geeks down! It's the other six I've got to worry about now. That's right, Dewey proposes that we share a quote every day this week.
There's something I just love about this quote other than the total relevance it has for politicians (and rather many of the people who spend a lot of time in the public eye). That's not why I chose it, though. I chose it because there's something I feel like I can relate to in it. That feeling that no matter what or how much you're doing you're not doing quite enough.
I realized this week that I've been making this blog into a burden and letting it sit heavy on my shoulders. This makes me think that maybe I need to do a sort of second look at my motives and figure out what it is I'm doing here and what it is I intend to keep doing here. A rehashing that, perhaps, has little to do with the inderminate "you" who may be reading this right now and more to do with getting things out on the table for myself.
I started this blog almost a year ago, and I'm honestly surprised that I've stuck with it this long. I'm not particularly known for my stick-to-it-iveness in the face of more "extracurricular" activities. I started this blog for but one reason. I was bored. Last year at this time, I had no job. I'd just moved, and I didn't have a very demanding social life either. I missed using my brain. I missed the joy I took from writing. So, I thought, what if I just start trying to review every book I read just to see how it goes? I anticipated doing it in some sort of internet vacuum that doesn't exist. I didn't start this up thinking, "Hey, I gotta go out and get some readers. If nobody comments, then I'll be lost and feel unloved and unpopular." It was just a personal project. But then, much to my surprise people did read it. People who like books a lot. People who write books and saw their books reviewed here and liked what they saw. People looking for new sort of way to market books. Unwittingly, I was on the radar.
Suddenly, my focus changed. I began to think things like "I must post this week so that the people who read my blog will keep reading" or "If I don't have a book review done this week, what kind of poor excuse for a book blogger am I?" or "If I don't get around to participating in this or that blogosphere event then people will just forget that I'm here at all." Soon, my blogging became all about other people and stopped being about me. It started being another responsibility heaped on top of many I'm trying to balance instead of something I was doing just for the joy of doing it.
So...I'm refocusing. Not quitting, certainly not that. I love books. I love talking about books. I love the people I've met through this blog. I love the book blogosphere and finding people who are more like me than most of the people I know in real life. I love receiving comments and I love giving them. I just don't like the pressure I've created for myself to maintain a "good" book blog by the standards of everyone else, and I'm ready to settle for whatever it is that I can accomplish with the time I've got within the parameters of what I can do while still enjoying what I'm doing.
This is not to say that I will renege on commitments that I've made or anything like that - merely that I will get around to things when I get around them. I have a job, a family, a social life, and places to be that aren't in front of the computer. If I can't post this week, that's okay. If I have to mark the posts in my feed reader "all read," I won't be happy about it, but I won't feel bad about it either. I guess I'm just trying to say that from here on out, I've determined not to feel any guilt and not to make any apologies about blogging. Nobody wants to hear that anyway, right? This post is for me. This blog is for me first. If other people enjoy it and benefit from it or get a kick out of "knowing" me through it, then that is a great bonus. But then, if you all pack up and move on to other blogs, never to leave me a comment again, I'll probably be bummed about it, but I'll survive. If my Technorati authority plummets and the new hits on the stat counter fade away and the internet forgets that I exist, it'll be okay, because I'll still be here doing what I enjoy when I enjoy it, even if I'm back in my imaginary internet vacuum.
Having been thus relieved of my self-packed emotional baggage, I hope to be a better blogger than ever, mostly because I won't have to live up to my own lofty rules and expectations which are so much more difficult than anybody else would even think of putting on me. Ah, I'm feeling refreshed already.
----------------------
But wait! I've come up with a brilliant way to balance the me-fest that this post (this blog?) has become. Something I've been meaning to blog about since I heard about it, but am just now getting to. Hopefully, you've all heard about it by now, but if you haven't, allow me to share. I happened by Maw Books Blog the other week to find that this month Natasha is reading and blogging for a cause. That cause is to help the people of Darfur and to inform more people about the genocide that is taking place there. There are any number of ways that you can help ranging from something so simple as leaving her a comment to linking to her from your blog or even volunteering to donate a penny per page that she reads this month to organizations committed to doing something about Darfur (something I'm happy to say that I will be doing). Please if you've got an interest in this at all, click on the picture to learn more about the genocide in Darfur and what you can do to help.

That's one day of this week's Weekly Geeks down! It's the other six I've got to worry about now. That's right, Dewey proposes that we share a quote every day this week.
There's something I just love about this quote other than the total relevance it has for politicians (and rather many of the people who spend a lot of time in the public eye). That's not why I chose it, though. I chose it because there's something I feel like I can relate to in it. That feeling that no matter what or how much you're doing you're not doing quite enough.
I realized this week that I've been making this blog into a burden and letting it sit heavy on my shoulders. This makes me think that maybe I need to do a sort of second look at my motives and figure out what it is I'm doing here and what it is I intend to keep doing here. A rehashing that, perhaps, has little to do with the inderminate "you" who may be reading this right now and more to do with getting things out on the table for myself.
I started this blog almost a year ago, and I'm honestly surprised that I've stuck with it this long. I'm not particularly known for my stick-to-it-iveness in the face of more "extracurricular" activities. I started this blog for but one reason. I was bored. Last year at this time, I had no job. I'd just moved, and I didn't have a very demanding social life either. I missed using my brain. I missed the joy I took from writing. So, I thought, what if I just start trying to review every book I read just to see how it goes? I anticipated doing it in some sort of internet vacuum that doesn't exist. I didn't start this up thinking, "Hey, I gotta go out and get some readers. If nobody comments, then I'll be lost and feel unloved and unpopular." It was just a personal project. But then, much to my surprise people did read it. People who like books a lot. People who write books and saw their books reviewed here and liked what they saw. People looking for new sort of way to market books. Unwittingly, I was on the radar.
Suddenly, my focus changed. I began to think things like "I must post this week so that the people who read my blog will keep reading" or "If I don't have a book review done this week, what kind of poor excuse for a book blogger am I?" or "If I don't get around to participating in this or that blogosphere event then people will just forget that I'm here at all." Soon, my blogging became all about other people and stopped being about me. It started being another responsibility heaped on top of many I'm trying to balance instead of something I was doing just for the joy of doing it.
So...I'm refocusing. Not quitting, certainly not that. I love books. I love talking about books. I love the people I've met through this blog. I love the book blogosphere and finding people who are more like me than most of the people I know in real life. I love receiving comments and I love giving them. I just don't like the pressure I've created for myself to maintain a "good" book blog by the standards of everyone else, and I'm ready to settle for whatever it is that I can accomplish with the time I've got within the parameters of what I can do while still enjoying what I'm doing.
This is not to say that I will renege on commitments that I've made or anything like that - merely that I will get around to things when I get around them. I have a job, a family, a social life, and places to be that aren't in front of the computer. If I can't post this week, that's okay. If I have to mark the posts in my feed reader "all read," I won't be happy about it, but I won't feel bad about it either. I guess I'm just trying to say that from here on out, I've determined not to feel any guilt and not to make any apologies about blogging. Nobody wants to hear that anyway, right? This post is for me. This blog is for me first. If other people enjoy it and benefit from it or get a kick out of "knowing" me through it, then that is a great bonus. But then, if you all pack up and move on to other blogs, never to leave me a comment again, I'll probably be bummed about it, but I'll survive. If my Technorati authority plummets and the new hits on the stat counter fade away and the internet forgets that I exist, it'll be okay, because I'll still be here doing what I enjoy when I enjoy it, even if I'm back in my imaginary internet vacuum.
Having been thus relieved of my self-packed emotional baggage, I hope to be a better blogger than ever, mostly because I won't have to live up to my own lofty rules and expectations which are so much more difficult than anybody else would even think of putting on me. Ah, I'm feeling refreshed already.
But wait! I've come up with a brilliant way to balance the me-fest that this post (this blog?) has become. Something I've been meaning to blog about since I heard about it, but am just now getting to. Hopefully, you've all heard about it by now, but if you haven't, allow me to share. I happened by Maw Books Blog the other week to find that this month Natasha is reading and blogging for a cause. That cause is to help the people of Darfur and to inform more people about the genocide that is taking place there. There are any number of ways that you can help ranging from something so simple as leaving her a comment to linking to her from your blog or even volunteering to donate a penny per page that she reads this month to organizations committed to doing something about Darfur (something I'm happy to say that I will be doing). Please if you've got an interest in this at all, click on the picture to learn more about the genocide in Darfur and what you can do to help.
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